I wasn't sure if I had abandoned this blog or not.
I'm glad to say that I'm back!
I did not attempt any jogging (or any other form of exercise, for that matter, besides walking) for over a month. Although I took my running shoes on vacation, I only used them once for a brisk walk. That felt a bit sad because when I started C25K, I often imagined that by the time we headed east for our usual summer vacation I'd be running 5 kilometres no problem. I envisioned running a local trail and running by the beach. Alas, it was not to be.
But yesterday morning, inspired by the gorgeous weather and by the resolutions that follow vacation gluttony, I ran once around my good ol' Loop. It was easier than I thought, and most importantly, it was pain free. That leads me to think that either my knee problem was an actual injury that needed time to heal, or that I was pushing myself to go too far too fast and I needed to step back.
As I ran, I thought about letting go of my previous goals and expectations. My implicit goal had always been to complete C25K by running 2-3 times a week in order to eventually run 5K 2-3 times a week indefinitely. Now I feel like my revised goal will be to run twice a week, whatever distance my body can comfortably handle. I'd also like to do yoga at least twice a week. I've practiced yoga on and off for years, usually in a class setting. Tonight, for the first time, I downloaded a yoga routine. I tried the Gentle Hatha Yoga 1 from www.yogadownload.com and it was awesome. Since it was the first time, I just got the free 20-minute session, but I'd definitely pay for the full-length one next time. I'm really elated to have discovered this user-friendly yoga resource!
Getting back to yoga adds new meaning to the "big stretch" part of my blog title! :)
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
I am upset.
I was sincerely excited to go for a run tonight because it has been an entire week since my last one. Even before I'd completed one lap around my Loop (at one point a couple weeks ago, I was doing 2.5 Loops), I started to register the now-familiar complaint of my left knee joint. I stopped to stretch and squat and to talk myself into another lap. But as soon as I started jogging again, my knee said NO with an unmistakeable jolt. I walked home, swearing under my breath.
Why Now? (Part Three)
(Link to Parts One and Two.)
A year ago, I lost about 8 or maybe 10 pounds over the course of a few months. I wasn't dieting or exercising; it happened due to a combination of factors, including: abstaining from all sweets and special treats during Lent 2009, breastfeeding a toddler, having a horrible cold (and thus no appetite) for ages and - how's this for honesty?! - pooping a lot (explanation: my bowels like to empty themselves out when I'm nervous, and at the time I was nervous twice a week because I was teaching a class). (Now I'm nervous about posting this personal info on my bodily functions. Ooops, gotta go to the bathroom. Ha ha, just kidding).
OKAAAAY, so back to the point: I gained this weight back over the course of the year and especially, it seemed, at Christmastime. It's essentially okay and unsurprising that I gained it back - okay because I am on the high end of normal but not particularly overweight, and unsurprising because the factors that caused me to lose that weight in the first place were temporary. However, I couldn't help but notice that most of those pounds came back during vacations. I know from some comments that my mom has made that this has been my parents' weight gain pattern over the past decades: at home, they maintain a certain weight, but on vacation, they gain (and don't easily lose it once they're back home). This got me thinking about the patterns that I have learned from my family about body image, food, weight and physical activity.
Vacations for my family have always been at my grandparents' place. There is a lot of food at my grandparents' place - from amazing butter-smothered vegetables from their enormous garden to succulent sweets that my grandmother prepares with immense love. I love eating what they offer to me, and I absolutely think vacations are a great time to feast together. But this past Christmas, I was disturbed to notice how out-of-control I sometimes felt in relation to all of that food. I felt compelled to eat and I often ignored what my body was telling me in terms of fullness or hunger.
A few months later, there was a death in our family. This was during Lent, when I was avoiding all sweets and junk food. On the evening that I learned of the death, I decided to deal with the first onslaughts of grief by: going for a walk (healthy), writing in my journal (healthy), and consuming an enormous order of onion rings (not so healthy). I was kindof shocked that I decided that I couldn't go through that emotional experience without fried food. All Lenten resolutions went flying out the window from that point on.
All of this left me feeling all introspective about my relationship with food and with my body. I thought about times in my life when I've felt more in-tune with my physical self and when my body has pleasantly surprised me with its capabilities (during pregnancy and childbirth, and when I do yoga). When the idea of running surfaced, I took it seriously. I wondered if maybe my life-long aversion to running had to do with unnecessarily limiting myself. Why should I feel a little flicker of panic as my body warms up, my breath quickens and my heart starts beating faster in order to accomodate the intensity of exercise? Could I move past that panic and actually improve my level of fitness? What kind of self-talk/ inherited narrative has led me to never even question the idea that I hate running? Why not give it a try?
I'm not sure if there is a Part Four to this question of Why Now. Part Three is enough food-for-thought for the moment, eh? I'd love to hear other C25K-ers answer to "Why Now?" too!
A year ago, I lost about 8 or maybe 10 pounds over the course of a few months. I wasn't dieting or exercising; it happened due to a combination of factors, including: abstaining from all sweets and special treats during Lent 2009, breastfeeding a toddler, having a horrible cold (and thus no appetite) for ages and - how's this for honesty?! - pooping a lot (explanation: my bowels like to empty themselves out when I'm nervous, and at the time I was nervous twice a week because I was teaching a class). (Now I'm nervous about posting this personal info on my bodily functions. Ooops, gotta go to the bathroom. Ha ha, just kidding).
OKAAAAY, so back to the point: I gained this weight back over the course of the year and especially, it seemed, at Christmastime. It's essentially okay and unsurprising that I gained it back - okay because I am on the high end of normal but not particularly overweight, and unsurprising because the factors that caused me to lose that weight in the first place were temporary. However, I couldn't help but notice that most of those pounds came back during vacations. I know from some comments that my mom has made that this has been my parents' weight gain pattern over the past decades: at home, they maintain a certain weight, but on vacation, they gain (and don't easily lose it once they're back home). This got me thinking about the patterns that I have learned from my family about body image, food, weight and physical activity.
Vacations for my family have always been at my grandparents' place. There is a lot of food at my grandparents' place - from amazing butter-smothered vegetables from their enormous garden to succulent sweets that my grandmother prepares with immense love. I love eating what they offer to me, and I absolutely think vacations are a great time to feast together. But this past Christmas, I was disturbed to notice how out-of-control I sometimes felt in relation to all of that food. I felt compelled to eat and I often ignored what my body was telling me in terms of fullness or hunger.
A few months later, there was a death in our family. This was during Lent, when I was avoiding all sweets and junk food. On the evening that I learned of the death, I decided to deal with the first onslaughts of grief by: going for a walk (healthy), writing in my journal (healthy), and consuming an enormous order of onion rings (not so healthy). I was kindof shocked that I decided that I couldn't go through that emotional experience without fried food. All Lenten resolutions went flying out the window from that point on.
All of this left me feeling all introspective about my relationship with food and with my body. I thought about times in my life when I've felt more in-tune with my physical self and when my body has pleasantly surprised me with its capabilities (during pregnancy and childbirth, and when I do yoga). When the idea of running surfaced, I took it seriously. I wondered if maybe my life-long aversion to running had to do with unnecessarily limiting myself. Why should I feel a little flicker of panic as my body warms up, my breath quickens and my heart starts beating faster in order to accomodate the intensity of exercise? Could I move past that panic and actually improve my level of fitness? What kind of self-talk/ inherited narrative has led me to never even question the idea that I hate running? Why not give it a try?
I'm not sure if there is a Part Four to this question of Why Now. Part Three is enough food-for-thought for the moment, eh? I'd love to hear other C25K-ers answer to "Why Now?" too!
Friday, June 25, 2010
Follow-up Snippet
(See Reactions to Running.)
Dad (surprised, questioning): "Did you just go running again?"
Me: "Yup!"
Dad (smiling, incredulous): "You're scary!"
Me: "It's not scary, it's impressive!"
Dad & Mom (smiling, approving, acknowledging): "Well...YAH!"
:)
Dad (surprised, questioning): "Did you just go running again?"
Me: "Yup!"
Dad (smiling, incredulous): "You're scary!"
Me: "It's not scary, it's impressive!"
Dad & Mom (smiling, approving, acknowledging): "Well...YAH!"
:)
Monday, June 21, 2010
Week ?, Day ?... minus knee pain!
I ran last night and my knee is fine today (though it was a bit achy during the run), so now I just need to figure out what exactly made the difference! There are a number of possibilities because I tried a bunch of new things:
1. I took it slow. I usually go around a particular loop in the park 2.5 times. Last night, I went around once, then walked and stretched a bit, and then went around again. (It was difficult to hold back and to accept that this run was not about making progress or improving on my last run. Every part of me was ready and willing to go further, except the cranky knee, whom I had to respect!)
2. I did some stretches that I don't normally do, particularly some deep squatting before, after, and once during my run.
3. I thought a lot about my general posture and tried to stay long and relaxed, with my shoulderblades down and my body loose. I evaluated my footfalls and experimented with how it felt to land on different parts of my foot. (I find it hard to determine what part I naturally land on, and even harder to figure out if I'm doing it "right" because there seems to be so much controversy on this topic out there on the world wide web.)
4. I wore my old running shoes instead of my new ones, just to see. I really hope that footwear is not a factor in my absence of knee pain cuz I paid a good wad of cash for those new shoes that are supposedly ideal for my flat feet!
5. (Not that this relates to possible knee pain but) for the first time ever, I didn't bring the ipod. No music and no clock. I didn't think that I would enjoy it as much as I did. I felt unencumbered. I noticed the noises of the park and the city, and of my breathing and footfalls. I felt more connected to my body because I wasn't wondering how much scheduled time was remaining. (Good thing I don't mind being ipod-less cuz the ipod is out of commission indefinitely, possibly because it was accidentally doused in apple juice!)
6. I iced my knee for a really long time when I got home.
I felt so grateful when I woke up this morning and could walk without pain! Now I just need to figure out how to keep it that way. I'm not sure it's wise or necessary to go back to the routines prescribed by C25K. My goal is still to run 5k but maybe I need some homemade intervals sometimes, like I did last night. As much as I love to follow instructions when learning something new, I also need to respect my pace and my body. I'm also wondering if I should therefore also modify my fantasy of running 5K three times a week. Maybe it would be smarter to run once or twice weekly and to do something different too, like pilates (which I've always been intimidated by but C25K has improved my confidence in the physical activity department).
Oh, look, it's 1:42 am! I've been doing as much school work as possible in the evenings after my daughter is in bed so I've been keeping some very last hours. Now it's time to go sleep.
1. I took it slow. I usually go around a particular loop in the park 2.5 times. Last night, I went around once, then walked and stretched a bit, and then went around again. (It was difficult to hold back and to accept that this run was not about making progress or improving on my last run. Every part of me was ready and willing to go further, except the cranky knee, whom I had to respect!)
2. I did some stretches that I don't normally do, particularly some deep squatting before, after, and once during my run.
3. I thought a lot about my general posture and tried to stay long and relaxed, with my shoulderblades down and my body loose. I evaluated my footfalls and experimented with how it felt to land on different parts of my foot. (I find it hard to determine what part I naturally land on, and even harder to figure out if I'm doing it "right" because there seems to be so much controversy on this topic out there on the world wide web.)
4. I wore my old running shoes instead of my new ones, just to see. I really hope that footwear is not a factor in my absence of knee pain cuz I paid a good wad of cash for those new shoes that are supposedly ideal for my flat feet!
5. (Not that this relates to possible knee pain but) for the first time ever, I didn't bring the ipod. No music and no clock. I didn't think that I would enjoy it as much as I did. I felt unencumbered. I noticed the noises of the park and the city, and of my breathing and footfalls. I felt more connected to my body because I wasn't wondering how much scheduled time was remaining. (Good thing I don't mind being ipod-less cuz the ipod is out of commission indefinitely, possibly because it was accidentally doused in apple juice!)
6. I iced my knee for a really long time when I got home.
I felt so grateful when I woke up this morning and could walk without pain! Now I just need to figure out how to keep it that way. I'm not sure it's wise or necessary to go back to the routines prescribed by C25K. My goal is still to run 5k but maybe I need some homemade intervals sometimes, like I did last night. As much as I love to follow instructions when learning something new, I also need to respect my pace and my body. I'm also wondering if I should therefore also modify my fantasy of running 5K three times a week. Maybe it would be smarter to run once or twice weekly and to do something different too, like pilates (which I've always been intimidated by but C25K has improved my confidence in the physical activity department).
Oh, look, it's 1:42 am! I've been doing as much school work as possible in the evenings after my daughter is in bed so I've been keeping some very last hours. Now it's time to go sleep.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Bookmark
Just came across another encouraging site via the C25K Facebook page: Knee pain.
P.S. I still haven't tried another run - because I'm 1. a bit scared and 2. crazy busy with my thesis. But it's definitely gonna happen either tonight or tomorrow.
P.S. I still haven't tried another run - because I'm 1. a bit scared and 2. crazy busy with my thesis. But it's definitely gonna happen either tonight or tomorrow.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Discouraged vs. Hopeful
My knee was very unhappy after Tuesday's run and I was feeling very discouraged. It felt stiff and fragile and I felt seriously impaired when I need to chase my daughter down the sidewalk, or carry her stroller up and down the steps to the subway. Because my knee started to bother me around the time that I finished the intervals and started the 20 and 25 minute runs, I began to think that my joints simply can't handle "long" runs. A couple friends sympathised, but also talked about how brutal running can be, and how runners regularly wreck their knees. I considered the possibility that I might have to respect my weaknesses and quit. Mega disappointment!
But then a bit of hopefulness creeped back into my doom-and-gloom. My knee felt stronger much more quickly than it had last week, which was encouraging. Then I read a few articles on-line, one of which begins: "Knee injuries are neither inevitable nor debilitating for runners. In fact, most knee pain is easily corrected if properly managed." A runner friend reassured me that knee tenderness (which he distinguished from the real pain of injury) is normal and will eventually go away and that I should just rest extra, maybe temporarily scale down my running time, and make use of anti-inflammatory medicine and creams.
So I haven't given up yet. But I haven't run again either. I have a crazy stressful school deadline at the end of this month so this is actually a good time for my running schedule to be a bit more relaxed. However, I do really like to follow instructions when I'm trying something new, so I'm disappointed to have to modify my C25K timeline.
We'll see what happens..
(UPDATED to add: Skimming back through my blog, I just noticed that I first complained of pain on the inside of my left knee way back on May 11! So this has been a weak point almost from the start. Hmmmm.)
But then a bit of hopefulness creeped back into my doom-and-gloom. My knee felt stronger much more quickly than it had last week, which was encouraging. Then I read a few articles on-line, one of which begins: "Knee injuries are neither inevitable nor debilitating for runners. In fact, most knee pain is easily corrected if properly managed." A runner friend reassured me that knee tenderness (which he distinguished from the real pain of injury) is normal and will eventually go away and that I should just rest extra, maybe temporarily scale down my running time, and make use of anti-inflammatory medicine and creams.
So I haven't given up yet. But I haven't run again either. I have a crazy stressful school deadline at the end of this month so this is actually a good time for my running schedule to be a bit more relaxed. However, I do really like to follow instructions when I'm trying something new, so I'm disappointed to have to modify my C25K timeline.
We'll see what happens..
(UPDATED to add: Skimming back through my blog, I just noticed that I first complained of pain on the inside of my left knee way back on May 11! So this has been a weak point almost from the start. Hmmmm.)
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Break and Back
After my 25-minute run last Thursday, my left knee was unmistakeably sore. The following day, it was bothering me with every step I took. I knew I'd need to take a few days off from running. It was kindof scary to take a break. Even though I've had 6 weeks to incorporate running into my schedule and to make it a new habit, I felt a certain irrational fear that I would suddenly slip back into being the non-runner that I was before I began C25K. I worried that I'd somehow instantly lose the 25-minute capacity that I'd worked up to, even though I know that'd be impossible in only a few days.
Tonight I decided to tackle Week 7 Day 1. I also decided to experiment a little with running faster. I wanted to see how much ground I could cover and also see if I would feel a bit lighter if I forced a little more spring into my step. I managed to maintain a brisker pace, but at around 18 minutes, I felt more exhausted than I ever have thus far in the program and I slowed down considerably. Yet after a few minutes at a slower pace, I was able to speed back up a bit for the last few minutes. As soon as it was over, my legs felt like jello and the cool-down walk back home was verrrry slow.
Even though it was difficult, I'm glad I tried to go a bit faster because I felt like my form was better at that speed. I also experimented with breathing in through my nose and out through my mouth, which may have helped me to breathe more deeply, or at least distracted me somewhat as I ran. As far as I can tell, I probably ran about 3.40 km, so I did indeed go further than last time.
The bad news is that my knee still hurts. It doesn't hurt as much as last week but it's the same kind of pain in exactly the same spot. I think that it hurts less than last week because I was paying closer attention to my form, but we'll see how it feels tomorrow. I am really really hoping that this is an injury that can heal, or a question of positioning that I can correct. I'm so so discouraged to think that maybe my knee just can't hold up to the kind of running that I want to pursue. I've been working towards the day when I can say that I run 5 kilometres 3 times a week and I hope that that can still happen.
Tonight I decided to tackle Week 7 Day 1. I also decided to experiment a little with running faster. I wanted to see how much ground I could cover and also see if I would feel a bit lighter if I forced a little more spring into my step. I managed to maintain a brisker pace, but at around 18 minutes, I felt more exhausted than I ever have thus far in the program and I slowed down considerably. Yet after a few minutes at a slower pace, I was able to speed back up a bit for the last few minutes. As soon as it was over, my legs felt like jello and the cool-down walk back home was verrrry slow.
Even though it was difficult, I'm glad I tried to go a bit faster because I felt like my form was better at that speed. I also experimented with breathing in through my nose and out through my mouth, which may have helped me to breathe more deeply, or at least distracted me somewhat as I ran. As far as I can tell, I probably ran about 3.40 km, so I did indeed go further than last time.
The bad news is that my knee still hurts. It doesn't hurt as much as last week but it's the same kind of pain in exactly the same spot. I think that it hurts less than last week because I was paying closer attention to my form, but we'll see how it feels tomorrow. I am really really hoping that this is an injury that can heal, or a question of positioning that I can correct. I'm so so discouraged to think that maybe my knee just can't hold up to the kind of running that I want to pursue. I've been working towards the day when I can say that I run 5 kilometres 3 times a week and I hope that that can still happen.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Distance
According to Map My Run, my 25-minute run tonight covered 3.29 km. To be honest, I'm a bit disappointed because it seems so far from 5K. But at least I know where I'm at. Which is lightyears from where I started!
25 Minutes, Nudity Included
Ah, the joys of big city parks! Towards the end of my run, I passed a man who was peeing by a bush. It was a very non-subtle public urination - he was peeing by a bush, and definitely not behind a bush or hidden by a bush, and his pants were mid-thigh, if not lower. I was mildly shocked and amused, although I did look over my shoulder a couple times afterward to make sure the nudity wasn't following me.
Apart from that exciting anecdote, what can I say about tonight's run? Well, I hadn't run since Monday and I was really looking forward to it. I was home all day today while it rained outside and I was feeling like I needed to de-stress a bit and get out of the house (by which I literally mean apartment). I made it though my first 25 minute run (C25K Week 6 Day 3), which is pretty amazing. Seriously, it's amazing that I (and all my fellow C25K-ers) can run 25 minutes after having only ever run 20 minutes one time, and otherwise only ever running 10 minutes at a time. When I first started tonight, I thought 25 minutes would feel so long, but before the podcast informed that I was in my final minute, I would've guessed that I had at least 5 minutes left.
While I'm pleased just to be able to complete a 25-minute run (that is, slow jog), I do look forward to the days when it'll be easier and feel more natural. Apart from a few moments here and there when I feel like I'm gliding along, I often feel awkward and kindof heavy. I somehow think it'll feel more graceful when I can maintain a faster pace. I'm getting there!
Apart from that exciting anecdote, what can I say about tonight's run? Well, I hadn't run since Monday and I was really looking forward to it. I was home all day today while it rained outside and I was feeling like I needed to de-stress a bit and get out of the house (by which I literally mean apartment). I made it though my first 25 minute run (C25K Week 6 Day 3), which is pretty amazing. Seriously, it's amazing that I (and all my fellow C25K-ers) can run 25 minutes after having only ever run 20 minutes one time, and otherwise only ever running 10 minutes at a time. When I first started tonight, I thought 25 minutes would feel so long, but before the podcast informed that I was in my final minute, I would've guessed that I had at least 5 minutes left.
While I'm pleased just to be able to complete a 25-minute run (that is, slow jog), I do look forward to the days when it'll be easier and feel more natural. Apart from a few moments here and there when I feel like I'm gliding along, I often feel awkward and kindof heavy. I somehow think it'll feel more graceful when I can maintain a faster pace. I'm getting there!
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Goodbye Intervals
I completed C25K Week 6 Day 2 yesterday, which means that I'm all done with the walking/running intervals. I find it hard to believe that I'm now ready for 25, 28, and 30 minute runs but I'm also looking forward to moving on. For the past few interval runs, I've been spending too much time wondering if the interval was almost over, but then feeling like I'm cooling down too much during the walks.
That being said, the little soreness in my left knee that I mentioned a while ago hasn't really gone away. I'll ice it (or rather, frozen-green-pea it) and maybe wait until Thursday for W6D3.
My parents are helping out so much with household chores, cooking and childcare during their visit. Yesterday I took advantage of their presence and went out for my run in the mid-morning, which is usually not a convenient timeslot for me to leave the house. There were way more runners in the park than I usually see. I had fun noting their speed and gait, and speculating on whether they were experienced runners or beginnners. I wonder what I'd assume if I could see myself plodding along...?!
That being said, the little soreness in my left knee that I mentioned a while ago hasn't really gone away. I'll ice it (or rather, frozen-green-pea it) and maybe wait until Thursday for W6D3.
My parents are helping out so much with household chores, cooking and childcare during their visit. Yesterday I took advantage of their presence and went out for my run in the mid-morning, which is usually not a convenient timeslot for me to leave the house. There were way more runners in the park than I usually see. I had fun noting their speed and gait, and speculating on whether they were experienced runners or beginnners. I wonder what I'd assume if I could see myself plodding along...?!
Monday, June 7, 2010
Why Now? (Part Two)
(For Part One, see May 19.)
I think the first time I ever heard of the Couch to 5K program was when I read about it on Crunchy Domestic Goddess's blog a while back (she wrote about it on October 23, 2009). Although I didn't consciously consider running at the time, the use of the word "Couch," and the fact that she described herself as someone who is most assuredly not a runner, did plant a little seed of possibility in my sub-conscious!
Then this spring, as I toyed with the idea of taking up running, I started hearing from a number of friends that they too had come to a point in their lives when they were attracted to the idea of running, much to their great surprise. Interestingly, a couple of these friends were women who felt that their attraction to running had something to do with being mothers. Not that they wanted to take up running in order to lose pregnancy weight, but that motherhood brought them into a psychological and physical state of being that opened them up to running.
My weekend running buddy has a son who's only a few months older than my daughter (who will be 2.5 on June 13!). My running buddy started running when her son was about 18 months. She explained that for her, there's something very slow and rooted about mothering a small child. Granted, there's a very active side to mothering (dashing around the playground, bending down a zillion times a day to pick up toys, feeling tired) but there's also quite a bit of stillness: chunks of time spent in the nursing chair or sitting on the floor playing with blocks. Some days we might feel tied to our homes, because it's not as simple as it once was to just get up and go out. There are naps to consider, snacks to pack, snowsuits to zip onto squirmy little bodies. We might travel less, as moms to small children, than we once did. These things are not bad. Stillness and rootedness and quiet times are all so very valuable, and I think that they are among the most important lessons that our little ones can teach us. But maybe, as my running buddy speculates, they also sometimes make us want to RUN (literally, and sometimes metaphorically).
So I'm thinking that maybe another answer to "Why now?" has to do with being a mother. For me it might relate to the stillness of mothering, but also to the sedentary nature of sitting-at-my-desk-doing-schoolwork. Sometimes, you just wanna MOVE.
I think the first time I ever heard of the Couch to 5K program was when I read about it on Crunchy Domestic Goddess's blog a while back (she wrote about it on October 23, 2009). Although I didn't consciously consider running at the time, the use of the word "Couch," and the fact that she described herself as someone who is most assuredly not a runner, did plant a little seed of possibility in my sub-conscious!
Then this spring, as I toyed with the idea of taking up running, I started hearing from a number of friends that they too had come to a point in their lives when they were attracted to the idea of running, much to their great surprise. Interestingly, a couple of these friends were women who felt that their attraction to running had something to do with being mothers. Not that they wanted to take up running in order to lose pregnancy weight, but that motherhood brought them into a psychological and physical state of being that opened them up to running.
My weekend running buddy has a son who's only a few months older than my daughter (who will be 2.5 on June 13!). My running buddy started running when her son was about 18 months. She explained that for her, there's something very slow and rooted about mothering a small child. Granted, there's a very active side to mothering (dashing around the playground, bending down a zillion times a day to pick up toys, feeling tired) but there's also quite a bit of stillness: chunks of time spent in the nursing chair or sitting on the floor playing with blocks. Some days we might feel tied to our homes, because it's not as simple as it once was to just get up and go out. There are naps to consider, snacks to pack, snowsuits to zip onto squirmy little bodies. We might travel less, as moms to small children, than we once did. These things are not bad. Stillness and rootedness and quiet times are all so very valuable, and I think that they are among the most important lessons that our little ones can teach us. But maybe, as my running buddy speculates, they also sometimes make us want to RUN (literally, and sometimes metaphorically).
So I'm thinking that maybe another answer to "Why now?" has to do with being a mother. For me it might relate to the stillness of mothering, but also to the sedentary nature of sitting-at-my-desk-doing-schoolwork. Sometimes, you just wanna MOVE.
Friday, June 4, 2010
Reactions to Running
On my way out to run tonight, I stopped to chat with some of my neighbours. We live in a cooperative apartment building so there's lots of wonderful neighbourly togetherness. These particular friends know all about my new-found running habit and are oh-so supportive. They asked me if I've noticed a difference in how I feel on a day-to-day basis since I've started running. They explained that whenever they find the time to incorporate some cardio into their schedules, they immediately feel energized, more settled, and absolutely convinced that regular cardio could change their lives for the better.
Their question caught me off guard and I'll be interested to think about it over the next few days. The first thing that sprang to mind was kinda random: I feel like it's easier and more fulfilling to take big deep breaths than it was before I started C25K. I'm not talking about how I breathe when I run, but just moments when I intentionally try to breathe calmly and deeply, like when I'm helping my daughter to fall asleep at night. But I don't even know if that connection (between cardio and impressions of lung capacity) makes sense.
The other change I've noticed is that I feel sore more often! :)
**
When I came home from my run, I was greeted by my beloved parents, who are visiting us for a few days. My parents have struggled with issues around weight and exercise for most of their adult lives. I'm noticing that talking with them about running feels slightly awkward. This is the first time they've witnessed me running and my Dad's reaction as I came in was to joke, "Who ARE you? Running? Really?" Then Mom asked me, "But do you LIKE it? Aren't you worried about hurting your knees or something with all that jarring?"
I recognize myself in their responses - or I guess, I recognize the ways in which I learned those responses from them. Not long ago, I also questioned runner friends with "But how can you actually ENJOY it?" I explained to Mom that it's exciting and motivating to see my endurance build up so quickly - from the 60-second runs of Week 1 to a 20-minute run in Week 5. Her response: "Twenty minutes?! I don't know about this running thing."
I'm not upset or disappointed about these comments, but it's important to note the reactions because I am interested in thinking through the attitudes to body, health, eating and exercise that I have inherited from my family.
Thoughts?
**
As for the run itslef, it was C25K Week 6 Day 1. It was okay, but not spectacular. Honestly, that 8-minute interval felt more difficult than the 20 minutes last time. I just felt kinda hot, and my nose was running, and my left knee was hurting a bit (yes, mom, I do worry about hurting my knees!), and maybe I'd eaten too much supper... Who knows why the same activity can feel so different on different occasions?! I don't want to whine, though, because I did complete it and I'm not too discouraged.
Their question caught me off guard and I'll be interested to think about it over the next few days. The first thing that sprang to mind was kinda random: I feel like it's easier and more fulfilling to take big deep breaths than it was before I started C25K. I'm not talking about how I breathe when I run, but just moments when I intentionally try to breathe calmly and deeply, like when I'm helping my daughter to fall asleep at night. But I don't even know if that connection (between cardio and impressions of lung capacity) makes sense.
The other change I've noticed is that I feel sore more often! :)
**
When I came home from my run, I was greeted by my beloved parents, who are visiting us for a few days. My parents have struggled with issues around weight and exercise for most of their adult lives. I'm noticing that talking with them about running feels slightly awkward. This is the first time they've witnessed me running and my Dad's reaction as I came in was to joke, "Who ARE you? Running? Really?" Then Mom asked me, "But do you LIKE it? Aren't you worried about hurting your knees or something with all that jarring?"
I recognize myself in their responses - or I guess, I recognize the ways in which I learned those responses from them. Not long ago, I also questioned runner friends with "But how can you actually ENJOY it?" I explained to Mom that it's exciting and motivating to see my endurance build up so quickly - from the 60-second runs of Week 1 to a 20-minute run in Week 5. Her response: "Twenty minutes?! I don't know about this running thing."
I'm not upset or disappointed about these comments, but it's important to note the reactions because I am interested in thinking through the attitudes to body, health, eating and exercise that I have inherited from my family.
Thoughts?
**
As for the run itslef, it was C25K Week 6 Day 1. It was okay, but not spectacular. Honestly, that 8-minute interval felt more difficult than the 20 minutes last time. I just felt kinda hot, and my nose was running, and my left knee was hurting a bit (yes, mom, I do worry about hurting my knees!), and maybe I'd eaten too much supper... Who knows why the same activity can feel so different on different occasions?! I don't want to whine, though, because I did complete it and I'm not too discouraged.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
20. Whole. Non-stop. Minutes.
Just a quick post to say that I did it! Week 5 is over! The 20-minute run last night went well. I downloaded a new podcast to keep myself entertained and spent a large part of the run marvelling at being able to run for 20 minutes. 20 minutes?! I imagined telling my husband about it when I got home, I imagined writing this post, I imagined finishing the C25K program a month from now.
I have a bunch of posts and thoughts on running floating around in my head but I need to go do some school work now (I'm a grad student).
To those of you who are still working up to W5D3 - you CAN do it!
I have a bunch of posts and thoughts on running floating around in my head but I need to go do some school work now (I'm a grad student).
To those of you who are still working up to W5D3 - you CAN do it!
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Change of Scenery
A runner friend told us that although he thoroughly enjoyed the marathon that he ran in New York last year, he's apprehensive about the one he's going to do in his hometown later this summer. In New York, he was a tourist, excited to see all of the different neighbourhoods; in his own city, he's seen it all before. Plus, he knows just how far it is from one point to the next, which can be discouraging.
We traveled this weekend so I ran in a new environment. Unfortunately it was much less enchanting than New York. The run (C25K Week 5 Day 1) was actually quite difficult, for a number of reasons. First, I wasn't on my usual turf, and it kinda threw me off. I made up the route as I ran, so I ended up doing some loops and doubling back in order to finish close to the place where we were staying. Which was a boring suburb. Second, I ran in the noonday heat, which was not fun. It wasn't even sweat-inspiring humid heat but just the feel of hot sunbeams on my head. Third, my husband joined me for the first time and he had no problem doing what it took me over a month to work up to. I shouldn't be surprised because he does other kinds of intense cardio (mostly hockey) but I secretly hoped he'd find it challenging and marvel at my running capabilities. He did indeed marvel and compliment me on how far I've come... but he also had no trouble keeping up.
Luckily tonight's run (C25K Week 5 Day 2) was very encouraging! We're back home so I went to my usual park and it was a cool evening. The 2 8-minute intervals were totally do-able.
So my first 20-minute running is coming up this Tuesday or Wednesday!
We traveled this weekend so I ran in a new environment. Unfortunately it was much less enchanting than New York. The run (C25K Week 5 Day 1) was actually quite difficult, for a number of reasons. First, I wasn't on my usual turf, and it kinda threw me off. I made up the route as I ran, so I ended up doing some loops and doubling back in order to finish close to the place where we were staying. Which was a boring suburb. Second, I ran in the noonday heat, which was not fun. It wasn't even sweat-inspiring humid heat but just the feel of hot sunbeams on my head. Third, my husband joined me for the first time and he had no problem doing what it took me over a month to work up to. I shouldn't be surprised because he does other kinds of intense cardio (mostly hockey) but I secretly hoped he'd find it challenging and marvel at my running capabilities. He did indeed marvel and compliment me on how far I've come... but he also had no trouble keeping up.
Luckily tonight's run (C25K Week 5 Day 2) was very encouraging! We're back home so I went to my usual park and it was a cool evening. The 2 8-minute intervals were totally do-able.
So my first 20-minute running is coming up this Tuesday or Wednesday!
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Weight
My motivation for taking up running is much more "be healthy" than "lose weight." I must admit, however, that I wouldn't mind losing 5-10 pounds and I'm surprised that I haven't lost any weight AT ALL since I started the Couch to 5K program. So if I hadn't started running/walking 3 times a week, would I have GAINED weight?
I'll let you know, dear internet, if I do lose any weight over the next few weeks.
I'll let you know, dear internet, if I do lose any weight over the next few weeks.
Sweatin' it up
We're experiencing a sudden heat wave in this large Canadian city of mine. I waited until nearly 11pm to go out for my run last night (C25K W4D3) but the temperature was still significantly higher than it has been for any of my other runs thus far. I ended up sweating a lot more than I ever have. I must admit that I kindof enjoyed sweating more because it felt somehow... cleansing? It testified to the fact that I really had worked hard. I prefer the sweat-dripping-down-my-face sensation over the beet-red-face-but-somehow-no-sweat-is-being-released sensation that I often have. (Not sure if this distinction makes sense to anyone!) With all that sweating, I was really glad that I was wearing my contact lenses because feeling my glasses slide down my sweaty nose is one of my pet peeves! I do prefer running in cooler temperatures so hopefully this humidity will subside soon. Even after a long cold shower last night, my face was still red when I went to bed.
I'm a bit nervous about Week 5 : the runs jump from 5 minutes to 8 minutes to 20 minutes! But I have learned to trust this program over the last 4 weeks so I'm thinking positive and believing that if I've made it this far, I must be ready for Week 5. I think back to my first run with my buddy when I ran about a half of the big circle track at the park. This past Saturday I ran at least 5 times that before taking a walking break. (Can you tell I'm all about the positive mental talk?)
I'm a bit nervous about Week 5 : the runs jump from 5 minutes to 8 minutes to 20 minutes! But I have learned to trust this program over the last 4 weeks so I'm thinking positive and believing that if I've made it this far, I must be ready for Week 5. I think back to my first run with my buddy when I ran about a half of the big circle track at the park. This past Saturday I ran at least 5 times that before taking a walking break. (Can you tell I'm all about the positive mental talk?)
Friday, May 21, 2010
Another Safe Run
Last night I ran Day 2 of Week 4 of C25K and it went well. I did start to feel a little stitch in my right side during the third running interval but it went away before the end of the run.
Earlier in the evening, we were sitting outside having supper with our neighbours and one of them told me that he has heard of a few women having been assaulted recently in our neighbourhood. He said that he noticed me going out to run late at night in my tank top and big earphones and he wondered if he should call me back to warn me. It's true that I run late in the evening (10pm, 11pm, sometimes a bit later) at least twice a week. That's just the way that my schedule works and I'm a night person anyway (to the extent that it's possible to be a night person and mother a toddler!).
Am I naive to feel safe? I thought a lot about my neighbour's caution as I was out running last night and it wasn't the most motivating or pleasant train of thought. I suppose someone could pull me into the park bushes or hustle me into their car, but honestly, I just don't think that will happen. I don't run on particularly secluded streets, and the park is big, relatively well-lit, and surprisingly populated even late at night. There are always a couple other runners, people on the soccer field, and people sitting on the benches around the lake.
Ultimately I think my decision to run in the late evening is part optimism/naivete (I think I'll be okay) and part defiance (these spaces are mine too!).
Earlier in the evening, we were sitting outside having supper with our neighbours and one of them told me that he has heard of a few women having been assaulted recently in our neighbourhood. He said that he noticed me going out to run late at night in my tank top and big earphones and he wondered if he should call me back to warn me. It's true that I run late in the evening (10pm, 11pm, sometimes a bit later) at least twice a week. That's just the way that my schedule works and I'm a night person anyway (to the extent that it's possible to be a night person and mother a toddler!).
Am I naive to feel safe? I thought a lot about my neighbour's caution as I was out running last night and it wasn't the most motivating or pleasant train of thought. I suppose someone could pull me into the park bushes or hustle me into their car, but honestly, I just don't think that will happen. I don't run on particularly secluded streets, and the park is big, relatively well-lit, and surprisingly populated even late at night. There are always a couple other runners, people on the soccer field, and people sitting on the benches around the lake.
Ultimately I think my decision to run in the late evening is part optimism/naivete (I think I'll be okay) and part defiance (these spaces are mine too!).
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Why Now? (Part One)
I have never been attracted to running. So why the change? The short answer is that as snow melted and spring came around, I felt like I wanted to be spending more time outside and active. For me this meant riding my bike. Unfortunately, my bike has spent about 2 years outside on our balconey and is consequently in need of a major tune-up. And we just never seemed to get around to doing it. So the easy answer to the question of Why Run Now is that I felt like exercising in the fresh air and running was the most accesible and immediate choice.
But in retrospect, I recognize lots of other factors that led me to running...
which is why this post is
To Be Continued...
But in retrospect, I recognize lots of other factors that led me to running...
which is why this post is
To Be Continued...
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
C25K Week 4 + New Shoes
Runners seem to be really zealous about the need for appropriate footwear so I'm ashamed to say that for the past 3 weeks, I've been running in shitty sneakers that I bought 4 years ago at Payless. But lo and behold, the situation has been rectified! I am now the proud owner of (okay, wait, let me go check...) Mizuno Wave Inspire running shoes, purchased this morning at the Running Room.
Generally speaking, I find running shoes to be quite ugly. Even these ones are all gray mesh with lime accents and those ubiquitous jagged lightning bolt details on the side. BUT these are comfortable and I really do feel like they are facilitating better running.
Which brings me to tonight! I did Week 4 Day 1 of C25K, which entailed running two intervals of 3 minutes and 2 intervals of 5 minutes, with walking breaks in between of course. I remember some friends sharing that they found the jump from week 3 to week 4 to be pretty startling. Although I am amazed that I ran for a total of 16 minutes out of 21, I didn't find it too overwhelming. As usual, I think my longer weekend runs really build my confidence for starting the new week with C25K.
Generally speaking, I find running shoes to be quite ugly. Even these ones are all gray mesh with lime accents and those ubiquitous jagged lightning bolt details on the side. BUT these are comfortable and I really do feel like they are facilitating better running.
Which brings me to tonight! I did Week 4 Day 1 of C25K, which entailed running two intervals of 3 minutes and 2 intervals of 5 minutes, with walking breaks in between of course. I remember some friends sharing that they found the jump from week 3 to week 4 to be pretty startling. Although I am amazed that I ran for a total of 16 minutes out of 21, I didn't find it too overwhelming. As usual, I think my longer weekend runs really build my confidence for starting the new week with C25K.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Joyful Weekend Runs
It seems like I always surprise myself when I run with my buddy.
This won't mean anything to my myriads of random readers, but for my own personal record-keeping: today we started running as we crossed the train tracks and we ran down and around the little lake, and then all the way around the circular "track" BEFORE I took my first walking break. Honestly, three weeks ago, I would run maybe half of the "track" and then walk half. Today as we ran that first stretch, I kept thinking to myself, "does my body need a break? could I go further?" and then I'd be swept up in our conversation again.
So is distraction the key to running success? I don't mind if it is, although interestingly, my running buddy was telling me about another running friend of hers who refuses to listen to music as he runs, preferring to stay in the moment and just do running. Although I'm generally attratcted to the "be in the moment" type of sentiment, with running, I'm looking forward to the days when I won't need the C25K interval cues and I can download some podcasts from CBC or something to listen to as I run my 5Ks.
This won't mean anything to my myriads of random readers, but for my own personal record-keeping: today we started running as we crossed the train tracks and we ran down and around the little lake, and then all the way around the circular "track" BEFORE I took my first walking break. Honestly, three weeks ago, I would run maybe half of the "track" and then walk half. Today as we ran that first stretch, I kept thinking to myself, "does my body need a break? could I go further?" and then I'd be swept up in our conversation again.
So is distraction the key to running success? I don't mind if it is, although interestingly, my running buddy was telling me about another running friend of hers who refuses to listen to music as he runs, preferring to stay in the moment and just do running. Although I'm generally attratcted to the "be in the moment" type of sentiment, with running, I'm looking forward to the days when I won't need the C25K interval cues and I can download some podcasts from CBC or something to listen to as I run my 5Ks.
Friday, May 14, 2010
C25K Week 3 Day 2
I think I prefer my late-evening runs. I would have done this one last night but I was out (watched a documentary and wandered around downtown) so I did it this morning. It was fine, but not as invigorating as the last. I actually did one more 90-second run than the program called for because of a screw-up on the ipod. The ipod's name is Lily, by the way.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
First Impressions of Week 3 (of C25K)
I've probably never listened to 30 consecutive minutes of hip-hop before. The podcast that I downloaded for C25K Week 3 was all-hip-hop-all-the-time and I liked it as much - and maybe even more - than the pop (Nicole) and techno (Robert) ones I tried last week. This one was from somebody named Suz, who showed up on the ipod as "kiss my black ass." Hmm.
The run was easy. I found that it went by really fast because there were only 4 intervals of running. The longer 3-minute ones felt entirely manageable. I even found myself running a little faster than I have, enjoying the sensation of (relative) speed. Again, I ended the run feeling excited about the progress I've made. I would even say I'm eager to try next week's 5-minute run, and beyond.
So far, I feel like this program is perfectly suited to my level of fitness. I wouldn't say that I was a couch potatoe before starting it because we are a car-less family in a big city so I'm used to walking quite a bit. So far the demands of C25K have never felt overwhelming; in fact, I've never felt pushed to my limit at all. For me, this is ideal because it's empowering - it leaves me wanting more.
The only thing that bothered me tonight was some slight pain in the inside of my left knee. I had noticed it when I was walking today and yesterday, and I noticed it when I was running, although it never really seemed to get worse. I think it probably has more to do with the way I scooped my daughter up out of her bed the other night than with running. But still. I am so afraid that I'll hurt myself and have to stop. I know the first thing I need to do to prevent injury is to get some new running shoes! Maybe tomorrow.
The run was easy. I found that it went by really fast because there were only 4 intervals of running. The longer 3-minute ones felt entirely manageable. I even found myself running a little faster than I have, enjoying the sensation of (relative) speed. Again, I ended the run feeling excited about the progress I've made. I would even say I'm eager to try next week's 5-minute run, and beyond.
So far, I feel like this program is perfectly suited to my level of fitness. I wouldn't say that I was a couch potatoe before starting it because we are a car-less family in a big city so I'm used to walking quite a bit. So far the demands of C25K have never felt overwhelming; in fact, I've never felt pushed to my limit at all. For me, this is ideal because it's empowering - it leaves me wanting more.
The only thing that bothered me tonight was some slight pain in the inside of my left knee. I had noticed it when I was walking today and yesterday, and I noticed it when I was running, although it never really seemed to get worse. I think it probably has more to do with the way I scooped my daughter up out of her bed the other night than with running. But still. I am so afraid that I'll hurt myself and have to stop. I know the first thing I need to do to prevent injury is to get some new running shoes! Maybe tomorrow.
Monday, May 10, 2010
List of Runs Thus Far
(Just to be clear, when I say "run" at this point, I mean intervals of walking and jogging.)
Saturday, April 24 - my very first run with my running buddy. I felt this one for a few days.
Monday, April 26 - Day 1 of the "Couch to 5K" running program. This was a lot easier than what I'd done on Saturday so I felt encouraged!
Thursday, April 29 - C25K Week 1 Day 2
Saturday, May 1 - another run with my buddy, roughly equivalent to C25K W1 D3
Monday, May 3 - C25K Week 2 Day 1
Wednesday, May 5 - C25K Week 2 Day 2. This one felt hard, for some reason. My body felt tired and heavy. But I sprinted for the last few seconds and that felt good. I remember smiling as I pushed it.
Friday, May 7 - C25K Week 2 Day 3. I tried a new time of day (mid-morning) and some new scenery (the posh neighbourhood next to our poor one) but still felt kindof sluggish, like on Wednesday. I wonder if it's because I was expecting my period.
Sunday, May 9 - run with my buddy. This was the best run ever, even though it was freezing cold out. I was amazed at how far I was able to go before I stopped to walk a bit. Our conversation (about books and birth and families) was stimulating and maybe the fact that I wasn't running for a set amount of short time enabled me to really feel whether or not my body needed a break. Plus there was something invigorating about the cold.
So these are all the pre-blog runs that I've done. I'm proud of how much I've improved in only 2 weeks. It feels like it's been longer than that.
Excited to tackle C25K Week 3!
Saturday, April 24 - my very first run with my running buddy. I felt this one for a few days.
Monday, April 26 - Day 1 of the "Couch to 5K" running program. This was a lot easier than what I'd done on Saturday so I felt encouraged!
Thursday, April 29 - C25K Week 1 Day 2
Saturday, May 1 - another run with my buddy, roughly equivalent to C25K W1 D3
Monday, May 3 - C25K Week 2 Day 1
Wednesday, May 5 - C25K Week 2 Day 2. This one felt hard, for some reason. My body felt tired and heavy. But I sprinted for the last few seconds and that felt good. I remember smiling as I pushed it.
Friday, May 7 - C25K Week 2 Day 3. I tried a new time of day (mid-morning) and some new scenery (the posh neighbourhood next to our poor one) but still felt kindof sluggish, like on Wednesday. I wonder if it's because I was expecting my period.
Sunday, May 9 - run with my buddy. This was the best run ever, even though it was freezing cold out. I was amazed at how far I was able to go before I stopped to walk a bit. Our conversation (about books and birth and families) was stimulating and maybe the fact that I wasn't running for a set amount of short time enabled me to really feel whether or not my body needed a break. Plus there was something invigorating about the cold.
So these are all the pre-blog runs that I've done. I'm proud of how much I've improved in only 2 weeks. It feels like it's been longer than that.
Excited to tackle C25K Week 3!
Sunday, May 9, 2010
the Brand New Title of my Brand New Blog
Mornings around here are usually very leisurely. Our alarm clock / 2-year-old daughter wakes us up sometime between 7:30 and 9:00 and we loiter, read some stories, eat breakfast together, and generally spend a couple hours waking up and getting ready for the rest of the day. So on the morning of my very first run, when I had planned to meet up with my running buddy about 15 minutes after I got out of bed, it was a bit of a jolt for me to announce to the 2-year-old that mama was going out. I tried to minimize my hasty departure by saying that I was "just going for a little run with Joey's mama." She felt sad to see me go. I may have promised her a timbit on return.
Later my husband brought her to the park, where Joey's mama and I had finished our run and were stretching on the grass. I told her that I was doing a "biiiiggggg stretch." And thus, a few days later, when she was pretending to go out by herself, she announched that she was going out for "a little run big stretch with Joey's mama."
So all of the credit for my lovely blog title must go to my little girl.
And I suppose it evokes other things as well, like how the idea of even a "little run" seemed like such a "big stretch" for someone as anti-running as me.
Yet here I am.
Later my husband brought her to the park, where Joey's mama and I had finished our run and were stretching on the grass. I told her that I was doing a "biiiiggggg stretch." And thus, a few days later, when she was pretending to go out by herself, she announched that she was going out for "a little run big stretch with Joey's mama."
So all of the credit for my lovely blog title must go to my little girl.
And I suppose it evokes other things as well, like how the idea of even a "little run" seemed like such a "big stretch" for someone as anti-running as me.
Yet here I am.
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